Part One of the Father–Mother–Child Trilogy

There’s a peculiar kind of performance playing out across the spiritual and digital landscapes. One where wounded men—and their loyal emissaries—cloak control in concern, misogyny in moral outrage, and projection in poetic quotes. They speak of karma while spinning chaos. They call it truth, but it smells like control. And when you no longer participate in their drama, they call you the villain.

But here’s the truth:
Silence isn’t submission.
Distance isn’t guilt.
And not reacting isn’t the same as not seeing.

The Patriarchal Troll

He is not just a man—he’s an archetype. The distorted Father energy wants power over everything. He punishes your sovereignty because it threatens the story where he’s always right. He calls it “protection” but wields fear. He doesn’t correct you with love — he humiliates to control the narrative.

In his world, authority isn't earned—it's demanded.

There is an order that needs to be established. And you need to succumb to his world order.

The Narcissist in a Mala Bead Cloak

He may appear worldly and open minded. But he gaslights and says you’re “out of alignment.” He breaks your trust then accuses you of betrayal when you speak. This isn’t sacred masculinity — it’s the colonization of spirit.

Anyone who dares to speak is immediately written off. As they are out of their control.

Projection: The Oldest Trick in the Book

Projection is when someone can't sit with their own guilt, so they hand it to you gift-wrapped in accusations. It’s spiritual bypassing's slick cousin. The troll tells the world you are unstable, delusional, bitter, while secretly hoping your courage doesn’t catch on.

Because if your voice rises — others might question his version of events.

Let's see these randomized situations and break into this archetype:

Take One: The Daughters and the Hierarchy

They speak of values, of protecting family honor — but their actions reveal the opposite. Observe how they treat their own daughters with rigid control, policing their every move, while lavishing praise on hyper-independent nieces or daughters outside their immediate bloodline. At least on the surface. Cause that's the way to maintain the pretence.

If their peers have daughters who shine too brightly, they often find ways to ridicule or belittle them. Especially in private. A woman who can speak her mind shall not be granted the air to breathe. Not because those women did anything wrong, but because the Father archetype cannot allow an equal to rise. A challenge to his supremacy must be neutralized. So he disrespects his own to assert dominance over others.

The message is clear: “I am the God here, and order must be restored.”

Take Two: The Silent Tyrant in the Marriage

At home, he plays a quieter role.

The absentee husband who distances himself emotionally, often painting his wife as “crazy” while guzzling red wine on the sly. But behind closed doors, it is his silence that fuels the dysfunction.

When things fall apart, he steps back — not to take accountability, but to position himself as the victim. He allows his son to step into the role of pseudo-husband, encouraging emotional dependence while refusing to engage directly.

A clever way to retain power while appearing harmless.

Take Three: Threatened by New Men

Imagine this: When a daughter marries, the appearance of a new man — especially one who is kind and distant from family drama — feels like a threat. Why is he not participating in my play? I am God, does he not know this yet?

This patriarchal figure cannot stand being outdone in strength or stillness.

Imagine moments of crisis — like a hospital waiting room while his daughter is undergoing surgery — he lashes out at the son-in-law. Yelling. Power plays. Anything to assert dominance. Catch them when they are at their most vulnerable.

In his world, even compassion must be conquered.

Take Four: Protecting the Legacy, Not the Truth

And then there’s the son. The golden child.

Now imagine - even when the son is underperforming, say he is siphoning money from his company, or slipping into illegal behavior, the Father archetype defends him fiercely.

Lies to the community. Exaggerates job titles. Covers up performance improvement plans as "promotions".

He doesn’t do this out of love — he does it because the image of the dynasty must be preserved.

The illusion of control must continue. This is reputation management 101. 🎭

Not for truth—for reputation management.

Patriarchy in Practice: A Checklist

Use this guide to spot patterns of the distorted Father archetype in action. If you’ve heard or sensed these, you’re not imagining it:

  • "You’ve always been too sensitive."
  • "Don’t embarrass the family."
  • "This is for your own good."
  • "You’re lucky anyone puts up with you."
  • "You need to learn your place."
  • "Stop being dramatic."
  • "She was asking for it."
  • "Your mother made me this way."
  • "Men don’t behave like this."
  • "You’ll never find someone better."

Each phrase is an energetic boundary violation disguised as tradition, concern, or love.

Psychological Tie-In: Narcissistic Family Systems

According to family systems psychology, especially the work of Dr. Karyl McBride and enmeshment theory, families ruled by a narcissistic parent often:

  • Enforce loyalty over truth.
  • Expect children to perform roles (Hero, Scapegoat, Lost Child).
  • Shame emotional expression.
  • Rewrite narratives to uphold the image of the patriarch.

The father in these dynamics often serves as the "untouchable center," around whom all others orbit. Daughters are either idealized or discarded. Sons are groomed into complicity.

Healing begins by stepping out of the orbit.

Naming the gravity well.

Refusing to spin the same story.

To be continued...